Turn down the lights, baby. It's too bright. Photo courtesy stock.xchng
Has anyone seen my dentures? World file
I'm all ears. World file
Sometimes you don't want to make a political splash. World file
Are you sitting on a feather, Councilor, or are you just glad to see me. World file
I’m in a proclamatory mood this week. I feel like a herald shouting out all the great local news:
Attention young lads and young lasses,
All Tulsans (all ranks and all classes):
The highway’s now lit,
(By mayorial writ)
Oh, where did I put my sunglasses?
What’s that bright spot on the horizon, I asked the other night. Why, it’s the Broken Arrow Expressway:
Our highways will outshine the sun.
The lighting is second to none.
Our space men up there
Will squint from the glare
Since Tulsa’s dark nights are now done.
The re-lit roadways aren’t the only bright stars worth celebrating these days:
Tulsa attests and affirms
And everyone else now confirms:
At 60, our Gunda
Is Tulsa Zoo’s wonduh,
At least among the pachyderms.
Think of it: In five years, our Gunda will be eligible for Medicare.
Of course, she's already getting top-class government health care.
At Gunda's birthday party the mayor let someone put a set of big floppy paper ears on his head. When you’re mayor, someone always wants to put you in an embarrassing situation so someone else can take your picture.
Mayor Bill LaFortune celebrated the opening of the the municipal pools one summer by jumping in off the high dive, which caused a photographic splash.
Here’s my advice to future mayors:
No thanks, I don’t wear floppy ears.
Such stuff tends to shorten careers.
I won’t dress the fool
Or jump in your pool
Or show off my budget arrears.
Speaking of the elephant in the room, did anyone notice that Bob Barry announced his retirement the other day? There’s a peach assignment for some local broadcaster:
Who’ll be Sooner Nation’s new voice?
Big Bob has retired. Who’s your choice?
Who’ll help OU fans,
Understand Bob Stoops’ plans,
And in his achievements rejoice?
All this good news, is enough to put a smile on G.T. Bynum’s face, but then again, anything seems to put a smile on G.T. Bynum’s face. The other day we had a picture of him in the paper that may qualify as the greatest political rictus ever displayed.
Councilor Bynum’s great mirth,
Is displayed for all it is worth,
His grin – in its measure –
Is as great as Heath Ledger’s.
Separated at birth?
