Scene - Blogs - Back monkeys as opposed to those kitschy brass ones

Back monkeys (as opposed to those kitschy brass ones)
Published: 2/22/2011 3:36 PM
Last Modified: 2/22/2011 3:36 PM

I couldn't find a monkey in Burberry, so this will have to do.

When someone says he has a monkey on his back (as so few women are ever heard to say this aloud, unless they're wearing flannel), I always imagine "Planet of the Apes" -- not the one with Marky Mark but Moses. That, and those little wind-up monkeys with the cymbals.

I prefer my monkey be instrument-free and wearing a cute little Burberry onesie. However, were he an honest monkey, he'd frequently break into choruses of "Get together with Mazzio's!"

It took me until this paragraph to realize the back-monkey analogy kinda blows, so my apologies. Basically, I just want to admit to having a food addiction -- THE worst addiction I've ever had, and I've dealt with a few demons between the ages of 25 and 29 version 6.0. But the food addiction thing has haunted me since I was 9 years old.

Whatever, I don't say all that to whine; I say it for practice, as I feel a confession coming on this evening at Dubya Dubya, which will be my first weigh-in since a week before Snowmegeddon. And lemme tell ya, I've definitely put on some pounds since then. Hopefully, confession's not only good for the soul but the waistline, too.

The scary thing, however, is that all this accountability stuff I've been preaching to myself (and, on less frequent occasions, in front of you) hasn't seemed to make a diffy in my diet. Basically, I'm hoping I can guilt myself into sticking with Dubya Dubya for a full month, even if I'm trapped in my house again by blizzard, hail storm, straight-line winds or whatever Mother Nature throws at me. Except my birthday -- I fully intend to take the day off work, hole up in my house and watch "Steel Magnolias" on a constant loop for 24 hours. But we'll talk about that later.

Kindly wish me luck, and I'll let y'all know how it goes tomorrow. I might even fess up to my current tonnage -- which, as I told you last time I sought HELP (Hillcrest Exercise and Lifestyle Program), I was about 226.4 (which equals 229.2 on the Dubya Dubya scales). A week later, I was 221.4 at HELP. And, last week when I went to the gym just ONE LAZY DAY, I was exactly 226.4 again. Trust me, that number will have climbed.

Peace, love and Burberry monkeys ... XOXO

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Living Wright

While other kids were watching "The Smurfs," Scene Writer Jason Ashley Wright was tuned in to "Style with Elsa Klensch." By fourth grade, he knew he wanted to write, and spent almost three years publishing a weekly teen-oriented magazine, Teen-Zine -- circulation: 2. After earning a degree in journalism from the University of Southern Mississippi, he became the medical reporter and teen board coordinator for the Hattiesburg (Miss.) American, a Gannett newspaper. Eight months later, with visions of Elsa dancing in his head, he applied for the fashion writer position at the Tulsa World, where he began working on Aug. 3, 1998. He is now a general assignment reporter for Scene.

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Past Articles By Jason Ashley Wright

2/14/2013		Knowledge is key in Alzheimer's care
2/14/2013		Living Wright: On a roll again
2/13/2013		Recipes: Canebrake chef shares truffle secrets
2/12/2013		Living Wright: Mardi Gras a passport to excess
2/10/2013		Valentine's contest winners: Elizabeth and Rick Franklin
2/8/2013		Tulsa area yet to be represented as 'American Idol' moves to Hollywood round
2/7/2013		Fundraiser, camp benefit kids with heart problems
2/7/2013		Living Wright: Tulsa Flea market trip yields hidden treasures
2/7/2013		Mardi Gras popularity grows as celebrations expand in Tulsa
2/5/2013		Jason Ashley Wright: Another suicide shocks, for now
2/4/2013		Eagle Scouts
2/2/2013		Street Cats to hold its annual fundraiser Feb. 10

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