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Lagniappe: Lust tastes like chocolate, trees taste like crackers
Published: 12/12/2011 4:44 PM
Last Modified: 12/12/2011 4:44 PM


The chocolate incarnation of one of the seven deadly sins. It was quite yummy.

I just finished off a big ol' bar of lust.

First, though, a clarification: Are you wondering what the L lagniappe means? For the uninitiated, I usually write a lagniappe (pronounced "LAN-yap") column the first Tuesday of each month. It's a Cajun word that means "a little somethin' extra." Basically, I ramble even more incoherently than usual on multiple topics. Just FYI.

Anyway, back to lust. Among the perks to my job are sitting near people (1) whom I like, (2) who get free stuff all the time and (3) who share the free stuff.

Today's swag I snagged involved a bar of "sinfully rich dark chocolate," which Meter Maid, the TV editor, received from the SyFy network about their series "Being Human" returning in January. The bar, titled "Temptation is a Beast," was imprinted with the word "LUST" on top. I only meant to nibble on a fraction of it each day of the week, but I managed to devour it within two hours -- and 60 minutes of that was spent in a meeting, away from the chocolate. Thanks, SyFy! I mean that with only a trace of sarcasm.

It's rather difficult to stick to Dubya Dubya (a.k.a., Weight Watchers) during the holidays. But I went to the grocery store Saturday and only bought healthy stuff. So I'm good on the home front; it's just the front lines at work I'm worried about.

Like the "Roy to the World" cans of popcorn our department receives each year from the very benevolent Roy Clark. God bless Roy!

I wasn't too keen on the vittles last week, though, as I had a brief stomach bug or something equally undesirable. All I wanted was Diet 7Up and crackers, the magical cure-all for queasy tummies.

After one of my Mamaw Wright's pacemaker surgeries (she was the first person in Mississippi to have a pacemaker, don'tcha know), the pain medicine would always make her nauseated, and she'd end up dreaming of cracker trees.

Love me some crackers. When I was a little kid, I'd pretend I was in a fancy restaurant and order hors d'oeuvre, which I had masterfully made from Zesta saltines, quartered slices of Kraft singles and hamburger dill slices. Loved them. In fact, I still do, although I only eat them together when I'm raiding Mom and Dad's fridge. It's like a guilty pleasure you wouldn't admit in public. Obviously, I would.

But what edible guilty pleasures will YOU admit to having? I wanna know, as do other inquiring minds. Tell us, por favor.

Peace, love and lust-covered crackers ... XOXO


Reader Comments 4 Total
Retired TPS in Texas (last year)
I stock up on the mini Almond Snickers at Halloween, freeze them and get the packages out one at a time. Since I am diabetic, I allow myself a little Snicker when I have been particularly good about my diet. A little something just for me. I don't share.
DaniOklahoma (last year)
I've been reading your posts the last week or so (down here in Circulation during my "down" time... hi!)and I've started a list of words that I need to look up. My vocab is def on the upswing thanks to your blog :)Lagniappe was on the list so thanks!
Ps. you're HILARIOUS and so well written. Love it.

Vernacularly Yours,
Bored in Customer Service
I like that idea, Retired TPS! Do you do the same with Girl Scouts' Thin Mints, or is that a complete no-no for diabetics? I mean, is it as long as you practice moderation?

And you are sweet, DaniOk! I hope things get less boring down there!! Ho-ho-ho ... j.a.w.
futureview (last year)
Oh, salt,cruch and grease...thy name is pleasure...my mom would take the leftover mashed potatoes from dinner (on the farm years ago)add an egg,some flour,chopped onion, s&p, and spices. Spoon into the leftover bacon grease and press into patties...The Pryor Creek version of Latkes! Enjoy with a couple of fried eggs and a homemade biscuit...heaven!!!

Double D
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Living Wright

While other kids were watching "The Smurfs," Scene Writer Jason Ashley Wright was tuned in to "Style with Elsa Klensch." By fourth grade, he knew he wanted to write, and spent almost three years publishing a weekly teen-oriented magazine, Teen-Zine -- circulation: 2. After earning a degree in journalism from the University of Southern Mississippi, he became the medical reporter and teen board coordinator for the Hattiesburg (Miss.) American, a Gannett newspaper. Eight months later, with visions of Elsa dancing in his head, he applied for the fashion writer position at the Tulsa World, where he began working on Aug. 3, 1998. He is now a general assignment reporter for Scene.

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