I'm still coming down from this morning's high.
Although I've never been a coffee drinker, I've taken occasionally to stealing bags of Starbucks Breakfast Blend to grind at home, then snort with free straws from QuikTrip. Kidding.
OK, so I'm a huge fan of iced and frozen coffee beverages lately. I usually get 'em from 'Bucks because, like Walgreens, there's one on almost every corner. Talk about convenience stores.
I drink these mostly in the summer, as often as four times a week, maybe even once on the weekend. This morning, though, I wandered downtown at 9:15 looking for a breakfast burrito (no idea, just sounded like a good one). But I kept comin' up short in the vittle-finding department and popped into Topeca Coffee -- awesome, loved it, tell your mama.
But, as is always the case, I get this foreign rush of energy, which I fuel further at lunch via Diet Pepsi at Billy's (love their chicken strips). By 1 p.m., I'm grinding my teeth and coming up with "clever things" to put in my column -- things that make NO sense to anyone else. But dangit to Darfur, I feel like I'm radiating with productive potency -- puissance, if you will. Thank God for synonyms.
See, see what I mean? This is ALL caffeine's fault. Well, maybe that of my neuroses, too -- dusted deliriously like nutmeg on a venti mocha frappuccino. Whatever, I can't ween myself off yet. Just this afternoon during a benefits meeting at work, I glugged down a Diet Coke. I couldn't keep my foot still while my eyes darted madly about the room -- their focus, that is, not my actual orbs.
I even Googled "caffeine" and "rehab" -- nada, save for several gazillion articles about people quitting. I was kinda hoping for an out-of-state, poolside shelter with no vending machines, where I could rest up and decaffeinate myself for a couple of weeks. Not expensive like Lindsay Lohan's or Britney's get-better centers but significantly discounted. Maybe like a fancy kennel. Oooh, this could be a new niche market for Walmart: Discount detoxification centers, each with a Sam's Choice cafe.
Heaven forbid I just drink water. Then again, considering I spend about $30 a week on caffeinated beverages -- eww, that's $100+ a month -- maybe water's the way to go.
'Til then, say a prayer, light a Yankee Candle for me. I'd do it myself, but my Hazlenut Coffee-scented one ran out a few weeks ago.
Peace, love and darting orbs ... xoxo
