By JUNE STRAIGHT Staff Writer on Sep 22, 2012, at 8:22 PM Updated on 9/22 at 8:22 PM
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Saturday at 7 a.m. I was quite pleased that I wasn’t going into labor. After all, I had a schedule to keep. My mom was flying in at 10, I was scheduled for work at 3 and the baby wasn’t due until Sunday. All was well.
By the time 5 p.m. rolled around I was amused by the absence of contractions. It was driving my mother crazy that my water didn’t break as she exited the plane that morning. Since then she's been checking in on me every hour. It's kind of hilarious.
But by 8 p.m. Saturday night, I was more than a little irritated that the birthing wheels weren’t in motion. I mean, yes, I’m grateful the baby waited for my mom to get here. And yes, it’s lovely that it didn’t interrupt my work schedule. But, now that we’d gotten over those hurdles, I thought we’d both be ready to get this party started.
When I was pregnant with my daughter, I had contractions for like 20 hours before we even got into hard labor and those felt like a whip going across my back and midsection.
I’m not even sure I can call these wimpy squeezy sensations contractions.
What am I going to do if this baby isn’t born tomorrow?
The nursery crap is all set up. The bags are all packed. There’s nothing left to do except complain about my swollen feet and ankles.
It hurts to walk, sit, stand or lay down for too long. It takes five minutes to get out the bed!
Where are my contractions? I need my contractions!
My work shift ends at 11. I was hoping to be timing contractions by then.
So far, coworkers, family and fellow parents have suggested a late-night shopping trip to Wal-Mart, power walking through the mall and loading up on spicy foods as ways to jump-start this labor.
Maybe I can shop, while power walking through Wal-Mart and while I’m there, pick up some jalapenos.
At this point I’ll try anything.
Maybe it’s too soon to worry. Maybe the baby will come on time.
And if it doesn’t, maybe I shouldn’t stress so much about it.
Besides, I’ve got an appointment to induce labor Wednesday if my spicy, power shopping spree doesn’t work.
But who am I kidding? I want this baby out of me ASAP. Any suggestions on how to rush a baby out of the womb? As always I’d appreciate any advice you can offer.
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