This is probably the most pleasant way to be shanked. Photo courtesy of Shutterstock.com
Far be it from me to slap a sales clerk, but I felt compelled to do so nonetheless Tuesday morning. So I did. The end.
OK, not really. That would be awful -- and never warranted, unless he or she said something about my mama or tried to shank me. And, quite frankly, if I retaliated by trying to slap someone with a shank (i.e., shiv, not part of a leg), I probably deserve to be shanked in the first place. Today's word, in case you haven't already guessed, is shank.
Anyway, I was at some dollar store near my house to buy a lint roller -- two, actually, as I prefer one at home and one at work. Whatever, I grab the rollers (and a bottle of Febreze), and head to the front of the store.
The entire time -- which was only, like, 45 seconds -- the cashier was talking on the phone. No hello, no thank you, just blab-blab-blab about ... I don't know, something really uninteresting.
I mean, if I heard the words "hospital," "fire" or "call the police," I would've sympathized, maybe even made a sad face and mouthed "I'm sorry" as I left.
No, Mme. Clerk de Sale was chatting about home stuff and didn't even look at me. Sorry, but that's rude. I don't expect sales clerks -- who are frequently treated rudely by people, as you've probably noticed -- to roll out the red carpet for me or hug my neck or anything. But good grief, Charlie Brown, can't you at least tell the person on the other line, "Sorry, hold just a sec, please," look at your customer, then say, "Thank you!" or "Have a good day!" or "Your fly's undone!" -- SOME kind of acknowledgment.
Or maybe I'm too needy. That thought crossed my mind as I made my way back to my car, muttering unpleasantries under my breath. But then I lost interest and drove to Hesselbein, where one of my tires was patched -- thanks, Hesselbein! Y'all rock.
But back to me -- or, actually, that sales clerk. Maybe she's become disenchanted with her job, despite the fact she's surrounded by great deals. I mean, seriously, $2.49 for Febreze? I totally paid more for that at a drug store recently, but I digress ...
Perhaps people are rude to her all the time, so she just tunes folks out. I imagine I'd be tempted to do the same thing. That said, maybe I need to go back in for some more Febreze (please tell me if you've found it elsewhere cheaper -- and none of those really sweet-smelling ones which remind me of a college night of daiquiris that did NOT end well) and chat her up. Or at least smile and mouth the words "Have a blessed day!" Then, if she flips me off, I can haul back and slap her.
Of course, my point is that we need to remember that people who don't show courtesy to us may be in need of some courtesy themselves -- a little love and attention, albeit totally platonic and not at all handsy.
In the mean time, if you see some lavender Febreze on sale, holler.
Peace, love and no more daiquiris ... XOXO
