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Now Playing First Base, Mickey Rourke
Published: 2/10/2009 2:49 PM
Last Modified: 2/10/2009 2:49 PM

What's all the outrage about?

What are they trying to do, ruin baseball?

What do you want, opposite-field singles?

What's next, dextrous fielders in left and right, and at the first sack?

Then what, fast games with final scores of 2-1?

Moving runners over?

Teamwork?

Come on, leave the baseball druggies alone!

The way the old goat media has reacted, you'd think baseball was a sport.

Baseball is no sport, it's pro wrestling. Mickey Rourke? The prototype first baseman for the Rangers.

What could be better than a 265-pound shortstop launching a 600-foot homer?

You think hockey fights are entertaining, which they are, nothing can compete with 'roid rage within the dugout, matching teammate against coach, something fun like that.

Of course, when one of the needled-up monsters comes to the plate, you can throw the record book out the window. And then burn it.



Reader Comments 5 Total

kc (4 years ago)
The joke is the "steroid era"& baseball's hallowed records.

First steroids have been around a long time. Players flipped when Boston OF Fred Lynn reported after his rookie year. He had gained a ton of muscle & was popping the ball out of the park. Performance enhancing drugs do include 'amphetamines' and they have been around a long long time. Steroids used to be legal in the sixties. They were sold off the shelf at Sal's Sporting Goods in the 60's, & yes athletes did take them. I've known ball players who played in the late 60's who took dianabol. The change was personal trainers and gyms available after games on the home & on the road. The benefits became huge.

Baseball records went to the wayside when they lowered the pitcher's mound. Now all pitchers are clones of each other. Tall robots that can throw decent velocity. Few pitchers under a certain size. The days of Eddie Shantz and Warren Spahn are over. Pitching is a big man's game with the lowered mound.

Spare me the piety about baseball records. The game was segregated and the records may have been held by many of the black ball players who couldn't get on the field. It's a great game & I marvel at the plays I see made in the field. Guys come in to play in shape. I doubt we ever see another Smokey Burgess silhouette on the field.
Dan the Man (4 years ago)
For once I agree with you Picker! Baseball is the most boring sport, if you can call it a sport? If it's not 20 to 19, you just watch the picher throw to the catcher. WOW!!! Isn't that fun! High scoring games are the only thing people want to see. Let the baseball druggies have there drugs so they can hit the 600 footers out of the park. GO PICKER!!!
wasmi (4 years ago)
This crap - along with caricatured salaries - have ruined baseball. Oh, to go back to the fifies and sixties. Baseball, as America's favorite sport, is, alas, no more.
john (4 years ago)
not everyday you see a smokey burgess reference....in fact not every decade
World Picker (4 years ago)
KC, it's sure not the players anybody cares much about.

The individual players.

It's the game.

You could put anybody or anything in the positions, and there would be a fair share of brilliant plays.

Fact is, cheaters are making lots of them.

Still a great game.

Played by a high percentage of punks and bums.
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Out Pick The Picker

The Picker began entertaining – and infuriating – sports fans in 1993. Each week during football season, he writes about his picks of college and NFL games in his Thursday Sports column. He's never afraid of sharing his opinions about the game and the personalities who play it. Readers have a chance to go against him each season in the Outpick the Picker contest. He welcomes the competition.

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