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Stars and Stinkers
Published: 6/18/2007 5:17 PM
Last Modified: 6/18/2007 5:17 PM

You can't blame a monopoly for being full of itself.


That's ESPN TV for you.


Somebody said Fox Sports was still around. But it's like a regional airline -- to be used if that's all there is.


It's unfortunate that having a smart mouth has become a requirement for working on camera at ESPN. This produces one of two images: A naturally talented person who comes across as witty and insightful, a contributor to a sport or a game, not an obstruction; or a loud-mouth drop-out from a local Komedy Klub.


ESPN TV should list the names of upcoming SportsCenter hosts so we won't tune in expecting a lively hour of great action and clever description, only to see Neil Everett sitting there like a Trekkie with his hands crossed just so.


ESPN TV people are every very good or they make you wonder why they were hired.


The Best of ESPN.

5. Bill Raftery.


Makes the basketball game better.

4. Chris McKendry.


Seamless.


3. Dan Patrick.


What's not to like.


2. John Anderson.


Quick.


1. Linda Cohn.


If you don't like her, it's your loss.


The Worst of ESPN.


5. The Sports Reporters, every last one of them.


How off-putting are writers who think they have to be seen to be heard.


4. Stephen A. Smith.


One note, loud.


3. Chris Berman.


No can of corn, a corn field.


2. Stuart Scott.


Actually calls LeBron James Bron-Bron on the air.


1. Neil Everett.


Channel changer.

l











Reader Comments 19 Total

steve (6 years ago)
it's interesting that you notice that...i don't really pay much attention to the announcers....i thought most people watched sports for the visuals of the players playing, not whether or not the announcer's good. i'll agree though some announcers are downright obnoxious and that causes me to mute the game- and possibly turn on the radio so i can here the "homer" announce it...unfortunately radio has less of a delay so you find out what happened before you see it.
world picker (6 years ago)
Steve, the radio people really are better at games.



Sports didn't used to be a format for the telling of dumb jokes. It's like anything else, the good ones like Madden and Michaels and Johnny Miller are good because they are original. Most of the rest are copycat jokers.



world picker (6 years ago)
Here's somebody who is pretty good, Stacey Dales, the former OU basketball player. They should get her off women's basketball and use her on something that people watch.

Steven (6 years ago)
I begrudgingly (mostly because of your "edgy" and "smart mouth" commentary that comes across as strangely "full of itself") have to agree with many of your assessments picker . Many of the ESPN folk are irritating at best.
How Stephen A Smith got his own show...simply wow. It is like watching a really really really bad Arsenio without the freakishly large digits.
Berman thinks that being a caricature of himself is endearing and witty...it isn't. It is more like having a fat, drunk uncle in a loud Hawaiian shirt overstay his welcome.
Stuart's act has gotten just old. He is like the old fella at the club sipping on tanqueray and tab sporting acid wash jeans and a "big dog" t-shirt.
Dan Patrick is class on t.v. and radio. He is bright, funny and brings refreshing honesty and insight. Although not apart of the discussion, how does Jim Rome (Mr. Repeat/ "I can beat a dead horse for hours") draw a paycheck? His popularity to talent ratio is as baffling as Nicole Ritchie.
world picker (6 years ago)
Steven: Did you see the classic Saturday Night Live bit that Ray Romano did? Where he was a new hire on ESPN and came up with the catch phrase: Sweet Googely Oogely, something like that. Said it about a thousand times per anchor bit. And it isn't far from the truth.



I like most of the women. You?



Fortunately, maybe, ESPN has hired an outside consultant to look over its operation. The first comment the woman consultant made was the reporters and anchors try to project themsleves into the stories too much.



Maybe I should have expanded the lists to ten or 20, get bozos like Mark May on there.



Rome has been shoved to an odd TV hour, hasn't he -- must have, because I never see him.



A quick aside: What's all the local yap about OSU's Curry making a mistake about leaving school? Can he get better next year? No. all he can do is stay the same or get worse or get hurt. So go.


TAB (6 years ago)
Surprised to see no Trey Wingo reference. I know you hate him, Picker. Also, in my opinion, Doug Gottlieb is terrible on ESPN. I think he has talent, but he has also adopted this contemporary "make up a controversy as we go to fill dead air" scheme -- the worst thing to happen to sports commentary since Disney bought ESPN. I do think PTI is great on ESPN, but I feel those guys are stuck with a lousy time slot and their show has lost some of the original gusto that made it great. Best moment ever: "Who would you rather be, Brad Pitt or Keith Richards?" Wilbon: Brad Pitt. You are sleeping with Jennifer Anniston (this is dated). Kornheiser: No my friend, you gotta be Keith Richards. At this point, all these drugs you've put into your body mean you'll never die. Not only could you get Jennifer Anniston, you could get her mom, too...
blanche (6 years ago)
You know, one guy you haven't mentioned who is I think erudite and poised (although he hasn't had a lot of national exposure) is Spencer Tillman.
Steven (6 years ago)
I do like most of the women...although I was thinking about how bad I think Pam Oliver truly is (she is a prettier version of Condy Rice without the gap). She doesnt give any real insight and just lobs near rhetorical questions at those she "interviews." Holly Rowe does a good job of getting the inside scoop and information, but her camera presence is frumpy and unexciting (this is not a personal attack or assault on her appearance...more of how she comes across).
Couldn’t agree more with Linda Cohn and Dales. Think Cohn works really hard to do a great job and it shows.

For my money (not espn, but in general), it doesn’t get better than the bulk of Costas and his takes. Also, I would love to see Rick Reily and Bill Simmons get TV action. I would pay to watch them give their takes on sports.

I heard on Mike/Mike in the morning that they will be doing a Monday night game with Ditka. Actually sounds interesting...to me anyway. I guess they are desperate to try anything.

-May is just so-so. average. nothing more. Seems to mostly just say something to seem edgy. He isn’t Barkley and it shows.
-Rome...like I said before...just...I can't even get started on that topic.
-As pretty die-hard OU fan, I am happy to see him go. He never "torched" us as it were, it always seemed to be the guy that we didn't plan on (if you can give Kelvin credit in the past for "planning" anything). The sad thing is...a lot guys are phenom high school players. A handful are incredible college players. But that list gets even tighter and shorter when we are talking NBA talent. Curry was a phenom in high school and a quality scorer in college. Curry is a great athlete at OSU and terrific all-around basketball player. A second round pick? Not in my estimation. As painful and true to admit, he reminds me a lot of most of OU's players (think Hollis Price) that were great players in college, but NBA superstar...not likely. Perhaps Europe or an NBA bench is most likely.

-oh, even as an OU alumn...I think Gottlieb has gotten better and better. Not nearly as bad as many think.
Steven (6 years ago)
my apologies.

how frustrating to read my post...I guess my spacing/new paragraphs don't take.
world picker (6 years ago)
Tab: I go back and forth with Gottlieb. He's got guts, but a smart mouth. Didn't OSU ban him? Offhand, having guts and an eye for the baloney probably offsets being lippy. Like Tiger's new muscle shirt, Gottlieb's pitiful free throw shooting as a Cowboy shouldn't matter but comes to mind. Tiger, get a grip on more than your short irons. You imagine Nicklaus in something that corny?



Blanche: Welcome. Yeah, you're right, Tillman is sane and sound, maybe a little too business-like once in a while; but it beats the sappy alternative doesn't it.



Steven: Reily on camera is nothing like Reily on the page. On camera, he looks like any other cheeseball looking for glory. The epidemic of writers hitting radio and TV is diluting all the products, the written word, mostly. The best time for writers to be on TV is to talk about what they've written. The best writer on the tube is on the best sports show on the tube, old-school Deford on Gumbel's HBO beauty, Real Sports.



Your blog is terrific, the lack of indenting or paragraphs is not your fault. Here's the way I do it. Where you want a graph, at the end of a sentence after a period, put a lowercase p inside the pointed brackets over the comma and the period.



Getting back to Curry: If you can't get much better and could stay the same or get worse or get hurt, sail when the wind starts to blow. Media pinheads always say stay. Otherwise there would be dead air.


blanche (6 years ago)
Picker...thanks for speaking directly to me. I appreciate it. You know, my husband won't say nothin to me when he's watching tv no matter how hard I try to fit in with him. The other night this basketball game was on and this guy threw the ball in from way yonder far out in the court and it went through that net thingey and I happened to say 'oh Earl! can you believe that? What a great shot!' but Earl says somethin like 'what the h-e-double hockey sticks do you know about anything?' because maybe it wasn't the team he was rooting for that scored that point. In fact, I know now that it warent the his team because they lost real bad. Serves him right. I put extra salt in his boiled potatoes that night...hope it counteracts the diovan.
world picker (6 years ago)
Well Blanche, I think you have to look at it this way. What if you didn't have a TV.
blanche (6 years ago)
You know, we didn't have one until three years ago...Earl's a pentacostal and he used to say that the tv was the devils workshop and now he only says that when one of his teams is losing or if he cant find any Car 54 reruns on TVLand. But the set we got aint that good, it's a 23 inch Sylvania that used to belong to my grandmothers friend Edwina who just died in 2004. But having it hooked up to cable sure does help the reception plus we get that Game Show network...I could just sit and watch those old Match game reruns with Gene Rayburn all afternoon.
world picker (6 years ago)
Here's some news you should like Blanche. Given Tiger Woods' new muscle kick, word is, he might wear a tank top during the PGA here in August as the temp hits 118 in the shade.


Blanche (6 years ago)
No I dont watch no golf. Nobody hits nobody else and its too slow movin. Earl and me watch NASCAR reruns when theres been a wreck - Earl says thats why everybody watches NASCAR anyways and since he has a whole bunch of wrecks recorded on one tape we'll just sit around in the evenings, watch those tapes, and drink a few beers (I only drink TAB, Earl is a Falstaff man). Earl used to like hockey when folks was fightin and carryin on on the ice but it got him too excited. And now, since his court ordered chemical castration, he's got to stay pretty quiet in the evenings anyways.
Steven (6 years ago)
and now to start my next million dollar idea.



collared tank tops.



step up nike...I am waiting for you to buy me out!



thanks for the tip

RR (6 years ago)
Not much comment on the ESPN anchors except to say that Karl Ravech is the only one who actually performs like a sportscaster. I really had to chime in to agree with the picker on JamesOn Curry. What are these OSU fans thinking?? I actually heard one guy call into a radio show this week and say Curry is making a mistake for two reasons, one he can do no better than the second round and two, he can help OSU return to the NCAA tourney. HOLD IT! STOP IT! NOW, OSU FANS, STOP! Here's a newsflash, J-O (as squeaky on the OSU radio broadcasts likes to call him)doesn't give a fat rats you know what about getting OSU back to the NCAA tournament and I agree 100% with the picker...he'll probably get picked in the 2nd round and develop in practice or D-League which is better experience than he would get spending another useless year in Stillwater. If they are telling you 2nd round James, then go..and yes, it is the right decision. Brains people...use them!
world picker (6 years ago)
This blog site is very smart and I thank you people for that.



RR, you're right twice. That Ravich is decent, I completely forgot him. And those saying Curry is making a mistake are just killing air time. Curry can make $250,000 at OSU next year? The guy is as good as he is going to get. Plus he's healthy.



I love the red tank top with a collar look for Tiger at the PGA, Steven. What's with that Muscle Beach nonsense. Smoker with a pot-gut took him at the Open. Tiger couldn't finish in the top five at Southern Hills with a Mulligan on each side.

world picker (6 years ago)
......I meant Ravech with an e.



Blanch, was that you and Earl at Starbucks this morning?

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Out Pick The Picker

The Picker began entertaining – and infuriating – sports fans in 1993. Each week during football season, he writes about his picks of college and NFL games in his Thursday Sports column. He's never afraid of sharing his opinions about the game and the personalities who play it. Readers have a chance to go against him each season in the Outpick the Picker contest. He welcomes the competition.

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