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The Big Score
Published: 2/8/2010 1:36 PM
Last Modified: 2/8/2010 1:36 PM

Give it up, dummies; continue celebrating, teammates.

We hit the big one to win Super Bowl Whatever in a good way.

We had the Saints outright.

Incompetent hacks by the score all had Indy to emerge victorious by margins ranging from laughers to routs.

Driving around Friday, we put on the Sports Animal radio slapstick show and listened as Dean "Mr. OU" Blevins and the one who preaches and shouts each went with an Indy in a breeze, which is one reason why the local ratings are about the same as a home remedy infomercial. Basically everybody on this network of missing predictors liked Indy, even the morning Animals, which have begun broadcasting on a regular basis from the bathroom; see you in September. Coach Pat missed another one, saying early in the week he figured Indy to win easily before stealing our pick without giving due credit. He last hit one in the late nineties.

Most ESPN oafs went with Indy.

All this reinforces the season's theme: if broadcasters and writers can't pick winners, why would you take seriously anything else they say?

There is no reason.

Why are so many make-believe experts so consistently wrong?

Picking requires skill.

Incompetent picking detracts from the game. People who picked Indy in a cake walk will by nature dislike the game simply because they're so wrong.

When it was in fact one of the greatest Super Bowls ever and was the highest rated TV show in history, flying past the MASH finale.

In related news:

The officiating was fabulous, because there was little officiating.

The Who pretty much creaked

The commercials were the worst ever. Only the Google bit registered. Snickers was OK.

Former OU kicker Hartley was not given enough credit.

Phil Simms was terrible as usual, missing, among other things, the injury to the NO corner that gave overrated Indy one of its few good moments.

In summation, we advise that you don't pay a speck of attention to anybody who picked Indy on top of other losers; and even there, discount the picks of homer Saint fans. Leaving THE Picks as your primary source of, well, you full in the rest, your primary source of wisdom?



Reader Comments 19 Total
senor notas (3 years ago)
The first Dorito commercail with the dog collar made me laugh out loud.
The Masked Assassin (3 years ago)
The Who was decent, Simms was decent and the commercials were decent.  You picked the game correctly, that's about it.
dcood (3 years ago)
Some of us 'morons' picked the Saints 2 weeks ago and stuck with it and I have the cash to prove it...
The Picker (3 years ago)
Heidi, the hoops contest is a good one. I don't think the prize has been determined yet, but it is usually something fine. Rules and the rest will be announced soon.Senor, I don't think the Dorito commercial works that way. The barking of another dog doesn't cause the collar to react, or shock, it's pressure inside the collar, not the actual bark itself. Could you imagine somebody else's dog bark shocking your dog?Masked, if you thought Simms and the Who were decent, you should be kinder and gentler, as you are the easiest person on earth to please.dcood, generally speaking, these games are harder to pick before they're played.S
ken7 (3 years ago)
Next year pick, no more 401k contributions for me. I'm taking the money and betting your picks. This year u were way better than the stock market!
Glenn616 (3 years ago)
Masked, how can you think that those three things were decent. It doesn't make sense how Phil Simms is the No. 1 analyst on CBS. The people posting comments to this blog would make better analysts than him. The commercials have gone down hill, especially the Coke commercials. Ever since the Janet Jackson incident, they've been wheeling out old hacks for the halftime shows. The Who singer looked 30 years past his prime.
The Masked Assassin (3 years ago)
1.  He played the game, he knows the game, he makes good points, he doesn't ramble and go off on tangents (like some beloved color guys we know), and he works well with his partner.???  Yeah, horrible.

2.  THEY'RE COMMERCIALS!  Are you really disappointed that the commercials weren't all you hoped they would be?  Distraught that you weren't blown away by the creativity and ingenuity being used to get you to buy stuff?  Some were funny and some weren't.  Same as always.  Again, THEY'RE COMMERCIALS!

3.  That's because he IS 30 years past his prime, genius.  Those guys are in their mid-sixties.  And they just played the SUPER BOWL.  How bout that?  Have you checked out how most guys look, sound and move in their mid-sixties?  Not like that, generally speaking.  What are you, 17?  How many 'thrown together on a football field in 5 minutes', live performances have you seen in your lifetime?  Me either.  Probably not gonna sound like the album too often.  That's because nobody does.  You're in luck next year, though.  I hear it's between Garth, Brooks and Dunn and Kenny Chesney.  That'll be SO much more entertaining.  Too bad Celine Dion and Wayne Newton were already booked.
The Masked Assassin (3 years ago)
I finally figured it out.  Phil Simms did the Picker's momma wrong while simultaneously running the spread offense.
MexiMike (3 years ago)
1. Phil Simms was awful.
2. There were four commercials that were funny highlighted by the Snickers (Betty White) commercial.
3. AC/DC would be great for next year's halftime music.
4. Media types need to stop with all of the "This means so much for the city of New Orleans" prattle. Stop it. Winning a Superbowl does not guarantee the resurrection of a city. In fact, the only thing it guaranteed was that Mardi Gras would start earlier this year.
The Masked Assassin (3 years ago)
I guess Phil gets around, even while vacationing south of the border.
The Picker (3 years ago)
Ken 7, it's true, had T. Boone invested in our picks, the Athletic Villiage would be up and running.Glenn, Simms announces about like his kid plays quarterback. Obviously all the Simms groupies loved Indy and wouldn't know quality if they inherited it.

buster (3 years ago)
Is the hoops prize going to be as good as football prize, a moon pie and a RC cola?
ken7 (3 years ago)
Pick, if I run into T. Boone Saturday, I'll give him your name..... LOL
DwayneDavis (3 years ago)
"discount the picks of homer Saint fans" - how dare you!

Couldn't agree more with the Hartley assessment but after his hero status a couple of weeks ago, it evens out.
DwayneDavis (3 years ago)
"discount the picks of homer Saint fans" - how dare you!

Couldn't agree more with the Hartley assessment but after his hero status a couple of weeks ago, it evens out.
The Picker (3 years ago)
Buster, it was a six pack.

Dwayne, all I meant was it's easier to pick the Saints if you love the. Neutral, taking them outright was not the simplest pick in the world.
justanotherokie (3 years ago)
I thought Simms hit a new low on the controversial (NOT) 2 point PAT.

What is this 'Second Motion' crud?  The dufus said nothing about breaking the plane.  It was as clear as the air in his brain.

I'm sure Obama will put Phil in charge of Fixing the BCS after that.
The Masked Assassin (3 years ago)
The ref missed it too, so I guess it wasn't THAT obvious.  Took the replay to get it right.  I guess that makes him a horrrrrrible announcer.  The Picker has you brainwashed.  Who's your favorite?  Boomer?  Gruden?  Jaws?  Yeah, they're awesome.  Can you even name any others?
The Picker (3 years ago)
Justanother, for Simms to hit that next new low, he'll be down with the groundhogs.

Masked, let us see your face, the mask is cutting off the circulation to your skull.
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Out Pick The Picker

The Picker began entertaining – and infuriating – sports fans in 1993. Each week during football season, he writes about his picks of college and NFL games in his Thursday Sports column. He's never afraid of sharing his opinions about the game and the personalities who play it. Readers have a chance to go against him each season in the Outpick the Picker contest. He welcomes the competition.

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