Tulsa World: Survey reveals struggles

MAKE US YOUR HOMEPAGE | Tuesday, February 09, 2010 | WIRELESS

Home > News > Article

Newspaper View Print this story

Comment

RSS

Bookmark

Survey reveals struggles

Youths gather in a circle during a meeting at Openarms Youth Project. CORY YOUNG/Tulsa World

By BILL SHERMAN World Religion Writer
Published: 11/7/2009 2:20 AM
Last Modified: 11/7/2009 3:55 AM

View a copy of the Tulsa reaches out LGBTQ Youth Coalition Survey.

Watch video interviews with families and individuals affected by suicide, and hear how they continue to cope. Learn more about the warning signs of suicide and resources for getting help.

Related story: Inside Openarms, all are welcomed.

Ben Crittenden was not shocked by a survey suggesting nearly 40 percent of gay, lesbian or bisexual young Tulsans have attempted suicide.

"It doesn't really surprise me," the Catoosa High School junior said.

"Coming from my own experience, before I came out I had thoughts of suicide because I wanted to be accepted in the world," he said.

Crittenden was one of about 150 young people who filled out an informal online survey sponsored by Tulsa Reaches Out, an organization that promotes the social service needs of Tulsa's "LGBTQ" (lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender, questioning) community.

He said he realized he was gay at age 13 and came out at age 15.

"Most of the school knows it now. Things are good. I don't get discriminated against, and I don't get rude comments."

He was mentioned in a recent New York Times Magazine article about junior high school students coming out.

Michelle Hoffman, chairwoman of the Tulsa Reaches Out advisory board, said the Tulsa survey was prepared by Chad Johnson of the University of Oklahoma and made available online.

More than 100 of the respondents filled out the poll on computers at Openarms Youth Project, a center for gay, lesbian and bisexual youth and their supportive friends at 2015 S. Lakewood Ave.

Most of the respondents were anonymous, and 21 percent identified themselves as heterosexual.

Hoffman said she found three areas of the survey particularly disturbing: questions about suicide, bullying and religious institutions.

"We were alarmed by the number of respondents who indicated that they had thought about or attempted suicide," she said.

Sixty-seven percent of respondents reported having suicidal thoughts or feelings, and 39 percent said they had attempted suicide.

"The main thing that worried me was that so many have considered suicide," said Tim Gillean, founder of the Openarms Youth Project. "That's because of harassment and bullying they get at school and, in some cases, at home."

A U.S. Department of Health and Human Services publication says that gay adolescent males are two to three times as likely to commit suicide as their peers.

In the Tulsa survey, about half of the respondents said they felt safe at school, and 34 percent said they did not.

Half said they had been bullied at school.

Hoffman said she was alarmed by the response when asked to identify people who had stepped in to stop a bullying situation.

"A tremendous number of teachers and counselors did not intervene," Hoffman said.

Respondents said 17 percent had witnessed a school principal intervene, 29 percent a school counselor and 41 percent a teacher.

Hoffman said she was alarmed many gay, lesbian and bisexual young people find no solace in their religious institutions.

Three percent said they had turned to religious institutions for support, and 30 percent said they did not feel safe at church. About 21 percent said their pastors or ministers had been somewhat supportive to very supportive.

Gillean, a lifelong Tulsan and self-employed interior designer, founded the youth center seven years ago "to provide a safe place, where they can be free from judgment, be who they are, and express themselves however they want.

"We give them a sense that they're part of a larger community. That helps create a higher self-esteem and empowers them to be who they are."

Survey discussion

Chad Johnson, assistant professor in human relations at the University of Oklahoma-Tulsa, will discuss the Tulsa reaches out LGBTQ survey at an interfaith breakfast from 8:30 to 10 a.m. Thursday at Fellowship Congregational Church, 2900 S. Harvard Ave. To make a reservation, contact Karen Davis by Wednesday at 494-8823 or KLDavis@Tulsacf.org.

Bill Sherman 581-8398
bill.sherman@tulsaworld.com By BILL SHERMAN World Religion Writer

Newspaper View Print this story

Comment

RSS

Bookmark

Reader Comments

Show: Most Recent Comment First

Add your comment

70 comments have been made on this story so far. Tell us what you think below!

Reporting Comments

If you see a comment that violates our terms and conditions, please help us by clicking the "Report this Comment" link next to a comment. That will alert the web staff to review the comment. Thank you. -- Web Editor Jason Collington

	Report Comment Dr. Strangelove, Tulsa (11/7/2009 7:28:00 AM) Good information. Tulsa Reaches Out sounds like a great organization. My family has only been touched by suicide once, and it was a close friend who was gay. I'll never forget the funeral and how painful suicide is for the family and friends.
	Report Comment Few Clothes, America (11/7/2009 8:00:02 AM) How many succeeded?
	Report Comment Few Clothes, America (11/7/2009 8:01:43 AM) I'm not being catty, I just would like to know.
	Report Comment marine2.0, (11/7/2009 8:09:57 AM) Shocking an abnormal behavior,homosexuality, follwed by another abnormal behavior,suicide. Would never have made that connection. How about we ask any grade schooler, or anyone for that matter-have you ever experienced bullying or harassment? I can safely say without a scientific study being conducted that 100% of the population has experienced some form of bullying and harassment. I think the root cause has something to do with that little thing called HUMAN NATURE. What's with the Q? "He said he realized he was gay at age 13 and came out at age 15." Barely culpable of committing a crime and distinguishing right from wrong at that age. Why is that the mental maturity is ageless when it comes to homosexuality? Thanks for exploiting this young man.
	Report Comment FIRE GUNDY, TULSA (11/7/2009 8:55:03 AM) And the bigot of the day award goes to......
	Report Comment scooter2, (11/7/2009 9:09:09 AM) They need to turn their lives over to Jesus Christ and be set free. I have to agree with alot of Marine2.0's comment. It is an unacceptable livestyle with God. That is sound Bible teaching.
	Report Comment redbeard, Stillwater (11/7/2009 10:33:16 AM) Many churches look down on gay people as evidenced by some of the comments above.I have sat in churches where the minister openly called gays "abominations" and called for Christians to not associate with them. I've wondered why gay people don't start their own churches where they can feel at home and accepted.
	Report Comment redbeard, Stillwater (11/7/2009 10:43:36 AM) On a positive note,my 9th grader tells me that there are many students at her school that openly admit they are gay and that this is acceptable,or "kewl" as kids today put it. Those who harrass these gay kids are looked down on and this behavior is not tolerated by most teachers.Maybe our kids are turning the tables on this kind of behavior.
	Report Comment marine2.0, (11/7/2009 10:47:21 AM) I never said unacceptable,I said abnormal. I also did not and do not predicate my beliefs on a religious doctrine. I was just showing that for political sake some things are made to look extreme when in respect and contrast they are not so. I don't know why anyone is gay and niether does anyone else. I just know that it is not a normal behavior within the consideration that defines a norm. I could care less if one is lbgtq or whatever.I only argue the politics. Your choices are your choices.
	Report Comment okpaul, Tulsa County (11/7/2009 11:02:42 AM) Redbeard, There are several predominantly LGBT churches, MCC (Metropolitan Community Churches) is a large denomination. Over 30 churches in the area are affirming and welcome LGBT members in their churches. Scooter, What you suggest is what leads to suicide. It doesn't work. You can't turn your life over to God and change race. God created them Gay and that is what they will remain. Reparative therapy is a LIE
	Report Comment scooter2, (11/7/2009 11:38:30 AM) okpaul, What I suggested definately does not lead to suicide. What I suggested is the best thing they can do. Turn their life over to Jesus Christ and let Him help them. He's really the only one who can. And if they come with a sincere heart and desire He will help them. Even nature teaches us this is wrong. I don't see how anyone could see this as acceptable. Whether religious beliefs or not. Common sense tells you it is wrong.
	Report Comment marine2.0, (11/7/2009 11:41:21 AM) okpaul, did you really suggest that race and homosexuality are comparable? What leads to the suicide is that instead of the acceptance that they are abnormal to which is fine, you and others try to make them believe that the lack of acceptance by others is the abnormal behavior and against them personally.Its like someone saying to me that I hate cops and I don't even know that person.Bias is out here and it always will be but carry yourself with confidence and don't give so much credence to the ignorance. That is just human nature. It is fine to not be defined by the norm, everyone has their various differences and behaviors. Promote the confidence in who they are as a person and stop basing it solely on the sexuality.
	Report Comment tbgalileo, Tulsa (11/7/2009 11:41:39 AM) Marine, you seem to be falling back on the good 'ol argument that if they "choose" to be gay, then they "choose" to endure discrimination and harassment. Personally, I can't believe that people continue to think that sexual orientation is some "choice" that people randomly make, and even if it were, that "normal" folk have some inherent right to spit on someone for being different. As far as bullying being an innate human nature, I call bs on that. Prejudice is very much taught and socialized. It is not natural to hate someone who is absolutely no threat to you in any way, simply to pad your own ego. And yes, discrimination against gay people is very much rooted in religion, regarless of whether that is your personal motivation or not.
	Report Comment okpaul, Tulsa County (11/7/2009 12:48:30 PM) Scooter What I refer to is churches who condemn gays and tell them God hates them...this leads to suicide. Jesus already loves them and he is saddened when people like you condemn them. Marine-Do you choose your race? No you are born a race. Just like you are born gay. There is no choice.
	Report Comment nucleardad, Tulsa (11/7/2009 12:48:35 PM) How many heterosexuals have thought of committing suicide?
	Report Comment nucleardad, Tulsa (11/7/2009 12:53:24 PM) If someone gave me a hard time about being heterosexual I don't think I'd ever consider suicide. How many black people consider suicide because of racisim? How many Jews have killed themselves because they couldn't deal with anti-semitism? Any statistics?
	Report Comment marine2.0, (11/7/2009 1:29:21 PM) tbj, take off your blinders and stop relying on emotion as your foundation for arguement. I don't know whether it is a choice or not and neither do you. Where did you come up with someone stating that there is an inherent (I hope you know the definition)right to spit on someone for being different. Actions and thoughts are very seperate and should not be confused. You can call bs on bullying not being human nature but only if you can show me world peace. You place the arguements of preference under the elements of right and wrong and fail to accept what is reality. What does ego have to do with it? Lost me there. okpaul, prove it. Give me the emperical evidence that supports your claim. Not some anecdotal belief but some real scientific evidence. Mind you I am not saying that it is not a choice but I am also not saying that it is. Don't know!
	Report Comment WeThePeople, Tulsa (11/7/2009 1:53:01 PM) There is something really sick about 9th graders thinking it is kewl to be gay. This shows me that being gay is a learned behavior. You cannot equate being gay to being a different race. The reason gays are committing suicide at such a high rate is because, as it says in the book of Romans, chapter 1: God is giving those who engage in homosexuality up to a debased mind. Being filled with all unrighteousness, fornication, wickedness, covetedness, etc. Who knowing the judgement of God, that they which commit such things are worthy of death, not only do the same, but have pleasure in them that do them. So we know that this type of behavior is judged by God. To let our children think, or accept, that homosexuality is "normal" is doing them a grave spiritual injustice. The suicide rate is evidence that there are spiritual consequences.
	Report Comment aint missbehavin, .. (11/7/2009 2:18:54 PM) Well,I know probably where Im headed.Thats ok with me,knowing that I was just as nice to the gay fella buyin cig.as I was to the Jahovah witness's that leave their plamplets,as I was to the woman with the big diamond rings,as I was to the woman with the dirty bellyshirt and a half doz.kids.Now,this religious stuff ya got goin on just aint right,I'll tell ya that....I believe in the goodness of the lord.I believe that through Jesus Christ,everyone has a chance to go before his father thy God,through this everyone is equal until that day comes....If'n I wrong,I only have one request.....Thats to hold the door for and to be the last one in there when he fires up the ole grill.....God's gonna getcha,,,,,actually...He's just gonna judge.
	Report Comment Atticus, (11/7/2009 2:26:33 PM) I think marine2.0 is gay. See you Big Boys at the 2010 Tulsa Naturals: A Bodybuilding Event featuring lean, tan hard bodies in tight, skimpy posing trunks!!!
	Report Comment aint missbehavin, .. (11/7/2009 2:52:18 PM) Marine 2.0 is allowed to there opinion.Its rather a little matter of thats what ya can here.If not,then push that button.Thats my story and Im stickin to it.
	Report Comment okpaul, Tulsa County (11/7/2009 3:54:45 PM) Marine2.0 You say you don't know.... ALL scientific evidence, studies, etc point to that is is NOT a choice. I can't give all the links here, but do some research.
	Report Comment psychedelikrelik, Tulsa (11/7/2009 6:35:21 PM) Young people, gay, straight or undecided, listen up! Suicide is not the answer. My first husband and father of my daughter committed suicide six years ago. It was the single most selfish act I can imagine. Don't be like that, be like ME! I will never even consider suicide, because it's what "they" want! If you off yourself, they're off the hook, you are no longer their problem. Show "THEM" by staying alive and being a pain in their @ $ $ forever!
	Report Comment psychedelikrelik, Tulsa (11/7/2009 6:38:45 PM) "Even nature teaches us this is wrong. I don't see how anyone could see this as acceptable. Whether religious beliefs or not. Common sense tells you it is wrong." Statements like this are evidence of the lack of support for science education in our state.
	Report Comment former tulsan 808, kailua kona (11/7/2009 7:18:57 PM) mr. gillean, miss hoffman and mr. johnson are doing a wonderful service to the tulsa glbt community.

25 of 70 comments displayed. | View All

Add Your Comment
In order to post a comment on this article, you must sign in to Tulsaworld.com. If you do not have a site account, you can create an account for free.