Will Says Arkansawyers Hard to Tame – He Knows
BY Will Rogers
Jun 30, 1928
7/18/12 at 2:05 AM
HOUSTON, June 29 – Well boys, she blowed up about noon today in a blaze of harmony.
Joe Robinson of Arkansas got the nomination with more democratic agreeing than had ever agreed on anything in the history of the party. They got a great fellow in Joe.
He is a real two-fisted he candidate. He comes from the wilds of Arkansaw where they are hard to tame.
I have had one in my house for 20 years, and there is just no managing 'em.
As usual the nominating speeches brought out names that sounded like a new immigration list.
Everybody was in a hurry and sweating and all the states were voting on the Smith nomination when it got to them. Course Oklahoma didn't agree, and the whole 15,000 people had to stop for half an hour while they called all their names and instead of sending 20 there was 40 come with half a vote each.
You would think that if a delegation stayed here a week they would know how to announce their vote.
But Mississippi saved Oklahoma’s record, for when it got to them they acted a bigger fool.
To my friend, Governor Ritchie, goes the record of stealing second with the bases loaded, for the first time in any convention. You could pretty near tell that Ritchie was a wet without him announcing it. This morning somebody in nominating their candidate told about them having been in Alaska, Germany, England, Russia, Cuba and South America. I couldn’t think of any American that has been in all those places but Herbert Hoover. But it wasn't, it was General Allen.
Mrs. Joe Robinson went over when Joe was nominated to the box of Mrs. Alfred E. Smith and told her that at all public receptions that she would be glad to take care of the overflow over at her house.
Women seconded and nominated as often as they got the chance and they were just as bad as usual.
Senator Gore of Oklahoma made the best speech made during the entire convention in seconding Jim Reed. Bless his old fighting heart, Jim took the floor at 12 o’clock last night and they didn’t "turn the rascal out" till 1:30.
Had a chat with Mrs. Charles Dana Gibson, Lady Astor's sister. She was on the New York delegation. They are natural politicians, that gang. The platform I will discuss later. A man read it last night, perhaps the last man that will ever read it.
Well, it's been a great time. These democrats are a great bunch, just as happy as if they were working.
Houston, the police, the people, everything was great and so was Kansas City. I tell you it was two fine conventions. But, Lord, I have looked at enough badges and heard enough speeches that if I ever hear another man say, "the grand old republican party," or "back to the Jeffersonian principals," I will go to the gallows with a clear conscience.
I just want to go back home and go to sleep for a month.
All the speakers said, "we are making history." Well, I don’t want to be disrespectful to either party, but I am just tired of seeing history be made.
I have got to go home and take care of my own campaign. Goodbye, Houston, take care of yourself. But don’t ever bid for another one of these things. You might get it. I got to get back to Beverly Hills and see Mary Pickford's hair cut.
Good night, everybody. I hope the next election is a draw and they have to run it off.
This is Graham McNamee and Captain White signing off, and swearing off from all conventions.
Come on, aeroplanes, let's show these delegates how to travel.