The Picker: Listing the top flops of the year
BY The Picker
Thursday, November 15, 2012
11/15/12 at 5:45 AM
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Original Print Headline: The view from below is not pretty
Here are the flops of the season.
Arkansas: Top 10 to bottom 10.
Mike Leach: Genius to cartoon character.
Skip Bayless: What's below a cartoon character? This guy is foul.
The Lakers: Have as a point guard an older person, Nash, who couldn't cover most of the league mascots.
Colorado Buffalo football: Ralphie wants to transfer.
The new TV show "Nashville:" Soap slop whose recurring theme is musical beds.
The Jets: Yesterday coach Rex Ryan actually said that Tim Tebow has been of great value on punt coverage because defenses always thought he might run from his blocking position.
Kendrick Perkins: Still plays for the Thunder?
Fair Meadows race track: Shut down its live horse racing meet, happy holidays in-state horse industry.
The new TV show "Vegas:" Makes Vegas look sleepy.
Vision2: Flunked local leadership test.
Former Thunder beard James Harden: Running with the dogs. Will be in the playoffs only as a spectator.
Fox TV: Couldn't get Romney elected.
Romney: Dogged from the outset.
Letterman: Lost it.
SEC: Too good for its own good. Here's the real poll. 1. Alabama. 2. Oregon. 3. Texas A&M. 4. Notre Dame. 5. Kansas State.
Running quarterbacks: Medic.
Lady Gaga: That's not her aunt?
NBA season: Ends around the Fourth of July weekend.
Samsung: TV ad promotes sending sex stuff on phones.
James Bond: Who cares how much money he makes, this sourpuss could only be James Bond's adopted son. Sean Connery is the real James Bond.
OU (-10 1/2) at West Virginia: Something of a letdown game, as both quarterbacks have slipped into the second round of the pro draft.
It's a good thing Mike Stoops is related, the way the defense has played in key moments.
Note to OU fans making the trip to this neck of the woods: Hang on real tight to your new-fangled gadgets like phones without cords.
OU by 13.
Central Florida at TU (-3): Two nice teams equal a good game.
UCF played Ohio State and Missouri better than TU played Iowa State and Arkansas.
Another perfect day in fall paradise, sunny and mid-60s predicted by the weather ninnies - so much for all those feared winter gridiron elements.
A win here doesn't equal a rise to the next level.
But it would be about a half a story improvement.
UCF by 3.
Texas Tech at OSU (-11): Hopefully those hideous rain-cloud gray uniforms are at the bottom of Theta Pond or Boomer Lake.
Talk about redefining winning ugly.
You can tell something about where the OSU program is without its NFL stars: somebody remarked that the Cowboys are bowl eligible.
Isn't that what people like Rutgers say?
Why hasn't the Tech coach been suspended for bopping a graduate assistant?
OSU by 10.
Arkansas at Mississippi State (-6): Here is the latest scoop on the Arkansas coaching job: 1. Bill Clinton. 2. Bill Parcells. 3. Phil Jackson. 4. Knute Rockne.
State by 4.
Iowa State (-7) at Kansas: Buy one ticket, get 10 free.
State by 4.
Tennessee at Vanderbilt (-2 1/2): The enemy has taken Rocky Top.
Vandy by 4.
USC (-4) at UCLA: Battle of the cheerleader mega-stars; USC's look like Rockettes.
USC by 3.
Kansas State (-12) at Baylor: K-State resembles a solid thoroughbred slightly out of its league.
Turning for home, it is trying to will the finish line closer as it keeps on churning.
The hundreds of hard blows appear to be catching up to the fine quarterback.
Neither this nor Texas is a cinch.
State by 10.
Stanford at Oregon (-22 1/2): Note the difference in Oregon's and OU's spread offenses: The Ducks can fly.
Oregon by 21.
Ohio State at Wisconsin (-2): State embarrasses sorry conference by going undefeated.
O-State by 3.
Green Bay (-3) at Detroit: Obama couldn't save this Detroit institution.
GB by 1.
Cleveland at Dallas (-8 1/2): The joke Dallas schedule starts to create the illusion of improvement.
Cowboys by 10.
Jets at St. Louis (-3): Any coach like Fisher who lets a clock run out before a 53-yard field goal could be overrated.
Sam is playing well enough.
Rams by 7.
Indianapolis at New England (-10): Luck runs out.
NE by 13.
Baltimore at the Steelers (-3 1/2): Without Big Ben, the Steelers are Kansas City.
Baltimore by 3.
Bears at San Francisco (-4): Head games all around, as both quarterbacks were knocked loopy last week.
SF by 6.