Jay Cronley: Want to spread germs? Fine. Pay up
BY JAY CRONLEY World Staff Columnist
Tuesday, January 15, 2013
1/15/13 at 4:44 AM
You eat right, food that sometimes tastes about like its container.
You turn off one of those television reality shows, where some hillbilly is messing with a gator, and you exercise. There might be more hillbillies on television reality shows than there are in all the swamps, sticks, hills and junctions put together.
You wash your hands at every opportunity.
You keep your distance from others when you don't feel well.
You take the stairs to get more exercise.
You take the vitamins.
And then somebody sneezes on you.
"Oops," he said, as if he had spilled some coffee.
This happened in an elevator, just the two of us.
It was a full-bodied sneeze that almost shook the elevator car.
I thought about punching any floor button and jumping off. But it was probably too late. We were only about five yards apart.
Defensive posture: I said, unsure of exactly how serious I was, yet, that perhaps we should exchange insurance information, like what happens after an auto accident - that if I got sick as a result of his blatant disregard for another's well-being space, he should be responsible for any medical expenses.
He said the sneeze had happened suddenly and without warning and that it had been nothing more than an allergic sneeze.
My response was that I helped write the book on some allergies and had never known one to kick in in a relatively antiseptic elevator without a carpet or cloth materials of any type.
What might he have been allergic to - fluorescent lighting?
As is the case with many one-sided disputes, the guilty party takes offense: And just what was he supposed to have done?
Stay home and don't spread germs. Or if you're in an elevator coming from a doctor's office after having been told to avoid public contact for five days, you turn and sneeze in a corner.
Take a number: So I requested his number to call in case I got sick.
He said there was no way he would be responsible for any illness of mine - I could have already been sick.
I said some CSI people could undoubtedly solve any germ puzzle.
The elevator doors opened and somebody coughed on the person who had sneezed on me.
Original Print Headline: Want to spread germs? Pay up