College student can make date with Cupid

BY AMY DICKINSON
Thursday, February 14, 2013
2/14/13 at 2:30 AM


Dear Amy: I'm a college student and participate in a club at college. We often work with another club, our "sister club," at a nearby university.

My friend "Mark" was hired to be a supervisor for the other school's club.

I'm really happy about that because I've known him for nine years. However, as we've been getting closer as our clubs work together, I've become extremely attracted to him. Still, I feel that pursuing him would somehow be ethically wrong because he is in a position of authority. Although he's only three years older than I am, he has this full-time job, which is to "supervise" young adults my age.

The very idea of a hired professional dating a student could be considered a bad example for the younger students. I worry that it could threaten his job (and my reputation).

I'm not sure if our long friendship would make the situation better, but I wanted to know if it was OK to pursue him or if I should wait until I've graduated (still a year and a half away) to even consider him romantically. - Scandalized?

Dear Scandalized: Your hesitation is sweet. Jane Austen-like, really. But I can't see how dating someone three years your senior who works at another college is a violation of anything: his reputation, your reputation, his career or your future (he is responsible for his own judgment).

Unless this person is married, your direct supervisor or your professor, then there's no reason to avoid Cupid's prickly embrace.

Dear Amy: I'm to be the best man at the wedding of a very longtime friend from high school.

Although we're in our early 70s, this is his first marriage (and undoubtedly the last). I'd like to throw him an unforgettable bachelor party, but booze and broads isn't my style.

I am hoping you or your readers might have some suggestions. - Really the Best Man

Dear Best Man: Congratulations to your friend! Marrying for the first time late in life is truly the triumph of hope over, well, everything.

It's definitely challenging for me to plan a party for someone else, especially given the dearth of details, but, truth be told, my most successful parties are the ones I throw in my imagination.

Here's what I picture for you: an event of vintage cars and cigars, 1950s memorabilia, music and movies, and toasts to your friend's future.

I'll happily run other suggestions.



Send questions via email to Amy Dickinson at askamy@tribune.com or by mail to Ask Amy, Chicago Tribune, TT500, 435 N. Michigan Ave., Chicago, IL 60611.

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