Living Wright: Sleep-texting proves we love our phones too much
BY JASON ASHLEY WRIGHT World Scene Writer
Tuesday, February 26, 2013
2/26/13 at 9:29 AM
sleep-text? Tell Jason Ashley Wright about it. Original Print Headline: Sleep-text trend: We like phones too much
I may have to start locking my phone up at night.
Have you read the recent stories about how people will text while they're sleeping? Kinda like sleepwalking but less dangerous - yet potentially as humiliating as drunk-dialing or the dreaded Vicodin-dialing following a wisdom-tooth extraction. Not that I know anything about the latter ...
Seriously, as often as I wince at the texts I send to people when I'm completely lucid, I shudder to imagine what I'd send in semi-slumber. Hopefully, it would be something like the harmless texts my nephew used to send me: "dkblwodkdgoi dihoej!!" But my luck, I'd be snoring while texting my boss, "bring me a donut" or something stupid. Because, for whatever reason, I often wake up thinking about pastries.
Whatever, all this unconscious communication no doubt stems from our over-attachment to smartphones, about which I'm having to call a come-to-Hay-Zeus with myself.
A proud accomplishment and another vow
I am somewhat proud to say that I have stopped texting while driving.
A couple years ago, I told y'all I would stop - and did. But there's a reason I dropped the word "somewhat."
I'd be substantially more proud of myself if I didn't use voice-to-text technology while driving, which is equally as dangerous. You see, I don't trust voice-to-text to understand my slight Mississippi drawl, as "Are you meeting me for lunch?" sometimes becomes "Are you eating me for lunch?" - which is never something you want to ask a co-worker.
More importantly, that's not something I need to be doing while driving. The texting thing, I mean.
So here's my vow, here and now (pardon the rhyme): I will refrain not only from texting while driving, but also voice-to-texting and texting at red lights. The latter of which, by the way, has been said to lead to longer waits at red lights.
Just last night, I saw a guy behind the wheel of a truck, texting at a red light. Given the green, I pulled through and glanced in my rearview mirror. Sure enough, he was still texting - and not looking at the road when he eventually pulled forward.
To quote Samuel L. Jackson from "Jackie Brown," I "ain't got a doing-time kind of disposition," so I don't want to be arrested for causing a wreck. Moreover, I don't want to hurt anyone else, as I don't know how I could live with myself after that.
As I alluded to earlier, I'm probably way too attached to my phone. I did refrain from naming my current one after Brad died last fall, so that's a good sign. Probably a bit creepy that I keep Brad in my messenger bag pocket and tell him "I miss you" a few times a month, but I think I'm making progress.
So the next time you see me in my car, and my lips are moving, I'm not talking to my phone. I'm just singing like I used to in the good ol' days, back when all we had in the car was a radio and a cassette player that always ate tapes - though that was something that always made me want to scream "dkblwodkdgoi dihoej!!"