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Calling all kings and queens


Tulsa World columnist Jay Cronley recently wrote about what it might be like to be in charge of the city.

“For a day,” he wrote. “Maybe for a long weekend.”

Under his reign, pay parking would go away, for a day. Lottery tickets would be handed out, one per citizen. Weathermen would quit running their warnings on top of NCAA basketball scores. Branch banks would cease and desist - at least from opening on opposite corners.

But … what if you were king or queen? In what direction would you take our fair city? What would you close or cancel, open or revive? Would you decree more work, or play? Whom might you fire, or hire?

Cronley addressed all of these and more in his column (reprinted here for inspiration). In 300 words or less, send us your own ideas and to the victors will go the spoils. Leave a comment until Saturday, April 18. Out of all the entries, one person picked at random will win 2 tickets to the Sunday, May 3, Fleetwood Mac concert at the BOK Center. For complete rules, click here.

We can’t promise you the key to the city, but we’ll make it worth your while.




If I were king of the city

Who wouldn't enjoy running this city?

For a day.

Maybe for a long weekend.

These would be the plans for a few shining moments.

Park it: Parking everywhere would be free.

Downtown streets with stoplights every block would be reprogrammed to operate under a system whereby a motorist driving the speed limit could make all the greens. The way it is now, sometimes you have to stop every block.

Residents would be asked for opinions about such things as where a new ball park might go and would get to express thoughts about matters such as what should be done with the perfectly good ball park we have now.

Everybody would get a free lottery ticket.

One public official could be dismissed.

The same bank could not have branches across the street from one another.

Team foul: A fine would be levied if KOTV ever runs another weather crawl over a score in the NCAA basketball tournament.

Under nonthreatening conditions, the weather segment on the local news would occupy no more than two minutes.

Companies using little bitty sons and daughters for television commercials would be warned for violating general principle standards.

People responding to articles in the newspaper online would be required to use their real names.

Garbage cans would be left in their original upright position by the refuse technician and not flung, pitched or rolled.

Water talks: Nobody's water gets cut off without a conversation.

Plans for something fascinating within six blocks of the BOK Center would be considered.

People who work cash registers would be instructed not to say, when making simple change, "No problem."

Television anchors would be asked not to say, in response to banter from a co-anchor, "Cool."

Neighborhoods could put in speed bumps.

Leasing agents would be held responsible for bad renters.

Casinos would post their slot machine takeout percentages.

Local politicians would be questioned between elections.

Jailbirds would pick up litter.

Ratty houses and buildings would be cited.

Tolls would take a holiday.

Good moods would reign supreme.
 
 
Reader Comments 32 Total
AnaBannanna's (3 years ago)
If I was Queen of City for a day.
I would install Equal rights protection for all our citizens. Then I would enact a mandate that all new Condo's and Apartment buildings that 10% of the units be set aside for low income or section 8 housing. (no matter the expense of the units) In a effort to decentralize the poverty. Then I would set into motion that we zone areas as agricultural and only when the farmer had made 1000 dollars per acre the previous year, could they sell it to the developers in a effort to stem the Sprawl of the city. ( Remember when the Falls apts. were the southern edge of the city ??? Now it extends past the Arkansas river.)

I would install light rail mass transit from B.A to Sandsprings and from Bixby to Sperry. With electric trollys making looping circles so people would have alternative to owing a car.
and on on on on and on and on lol

So many things could be done to make our city a icon of modern development and make it the best city in America to live in.
wotko (3 years ago)
As King of Tulsa, I would:

1) End property taxes and charge every househould the same set rate regardless of the appraised value of their house and property.
2) Lower the usually outrageous ticket prices of the BOK Center.
3)Demand a clear explanation of why the existing Drillers stadium could not have simply been remodled and where Driller's loyalty lies regarding their consideration to ever leave Tulsa.
4)Create a workshop that encourages the people of Tulsa and those of the surrounding cities/towns to work together to ensure the vitality of Tulsa for many generations to come.
5)Inform all Tulsa police officers to write wreckless driving tickets and a newly created ticket of attempting to incite road rage to all drivers who go slow in the fast lane and those who do not use their blinker or only turn their blinker on as they are going into the turn.
6)Ban up with tree signs made from WOOD!
7)End urban sprawl and refocuse development on the existing portion of the city in an attempt to reverse urban decay.
8)Encourage the planting of natural vegetation throughout the city.
9)Inform people of how the Arkansas River is supposed to naturally look.
10) Set a limit on the number of churches and car dealerships that can be located in a square mile.
11) Create a mass transit system that would run to and from Tulsa to all of the major cities within the Tulsa Metro.
stugraham (3 years ago)
The first thing I would do as King is decree a three day work week. In addition, school would only be three days a week, the same three as work, with no bus service, and more neighborhood schools. Grade school would only be reading, writing, and arithmetic, through 7th grade. Then sociology, science, business, history, and humanities would be added. All athletic events would be free to attend, and high school sports would have four categories in the larger schools. Football would have an "A", "B", "C" and "D" team. All would play.

There would only be streets every square mile, encouraging people to walk or ride bicycles.

All business would be given the opportunity to relocate or operate as a employee-run outfit. The employees would elect the manager, and all profit would be divided. Ten percent would go to the city, ten percent to investors, and the other 80% would be divided equally amongst the workers, based on tenure.

Hospitals would all be free, with the King setting the scaled wages for health care workers. Lawyers would not be allowed to practice in the city, any legal issues would be addressed on Saturday at City Hall. A panel of twelve citizens, twelve appointed judges, and twelve religious leaders would render a decision.

Television would be limited to the hours of 7 to 10 p.m.

City meetings would be held quarterly to discuss all issues brought forth, held at the BOK Center, which would have its' name changed to Citizens Center. Speaking time would be granted in five minute intervals, and the King would decide the relevance, reduction or increase of speaking time.

The city would operate as a business, and taxation would be a flat rate.

And lastly, Jay Cronley would be appointed Court Jester.
27thLancer (3 years ago)
As King for the Day, I would first exile Stugraham for trying to recreate Tulsa into a socialistic/communistic city.

Once that was done, I would make school year-round with 3 three week breaks between sessions. Anyone who wants to participate in an extracurricular activity will have to pay to fund it.

I would replace property taxes with a fee for service model to pay for police, fire, EMSA, road crews, etc. This would charge each citizen a fixed amount per month to cover all essential city services -- about $100 per month per person (kids too).

Next, anyone receiving any type of government welfare or unemployment benefit will be required to fix potholes or pick up trash one day per week. This can be their way of saying "Thank You" to those of us who are funding their livelyhood.

I would sell the airport to a private company and allow them to run it for a profit. I would do the same for the bus system. If you want to ride the bus then you need to pay what it costs to move you from point A to point B.

No private facilities will be built with public money....sorry Drillers.

I would end my day by declaring that everyone must read "Atlas Shrugged" and we can all then live in a Libertarian Utopia.
SRhiannon (3 years ago)
As queen for the day, I would sign a decree to make it a requirement that at least one parent be required to volunteer at their child's school at least once a quarter.

I would

I would also have a free concert at my "castle" and have Fleetwood Mac headline it.
claybr (3 years ago)
As King for the day, I would make it mandatory that scripture and prayer be put back in the classroom to start each child's day. Also, teachers would be allowed to give students swats as needed! Parents would be held more accountable for their child's actions.
krissy (3 years ago)
have all my family and friends get in a limo go shopping get new clothes, moviies, get nails our done ,out to eat, get our hair done, go spa and get message
OPEN YOUR EYES TULSA (3 years ago)
1. Put a trolley system downtown and train to BA and the airport.
2. Stop turning art deco buildings into parking lots.
3. Start a world class recycling program that other cities would applaud Tulsa for and want to copy.
4. Put hydro-electric dams in the Arkansas River so the city can profit off of a project for once.
5. Make the taxi drivers maintain their cars better and charge a set posted fee.
6. Cut taxes and wasteful spending :)
Popeye (3 years ago)
1. Dissolve the TMAPC and THA.
2. Return our charter to a weak-mayor form with commissioners.
3. Establish truck routes and weight limits for main thoroughfares and expressways.
4. Declare a $0.05 city gasoline and diesel tax to be used solely for roads and bridges in the metropolitan area.
5. Ban any further apartment construction of any kind in the metropotitan area.
6. Rewrite the zoning process and set strict standards for all types of construction.
7. Declare the University of Tulsa an historic area and set about making that area of town remarkable in every aspect.
8. Get a quality amusement park situated in the downtown area, near the new ballpark.
9. Set strict guidelines for the Tulsa Public Schools and establish a parental responsibility panel to oversee new laws making parents accountable for the actions of their children, whether they live with them or not.
QueenBella (3 years ago)
As queen for the day, I would have a royal party to celebrate the princess or queen in every little girl, teenager or woman in T-town.
mamamany (3 years ago)
if i were queen my 1st visit would be to the lauren dester shelter to pass out gifts of baby dolls and toy trucksdipping into my lavish bank account.I would then go to Quiznos and hand out free food to everyone who comes in that day.I would make them pay it forward tho.
I would have a meet me at the pole (even if it wasn't wed!)
I would go to Merrits and have all my servants eat chocolate and not gain any weight!
I would have a community center erected so kids can play after school instead of getting into trouble.
I would love to have cheesy music blast thru out the city to calm the masses.
I would make the arkansas river look good and flow w/ water so noone will have to look at a sandbar.
I would have a no tax day.
I would give teachers and bus drivers the day off and let them know they are appreciated w/ 500 gift cards from my personal account!
I would plant trees around tulsa thru Up With Trees.
I would tithe more then 10%
Coffee, please. (3 years ago)
If I were queen for a day, I would outlaw people from BLARING their stereos, in their cars, that make the fillings in my teeth shake, through my CLOSED CAR WINDOWS!!
At every red light (Which by the way, some people seem to ignore, in Tulsa. That would be another issue I would address, when I am made queen.) my ears are assaulted by someone who thinks everyone wants to hear what they have blasting on their car stereo.
Sometimes I feel that I am at the boardwalk on the Jersey shore, walking past some obnoxious (read LOUD) store, but wait. I am in my own car! At a red light! With nowhere to go! A captive audience! Forced to listen to what is called "music".
Fleetwood Mac it isn't.
YoPaulie (3 years ago)
Hear Ye, Hear Ye: On this beautiful Spring day, the King encourages(strongly)the development of Arkansas River and the northside of the city by the construction of a canal from the river to a point near the center of what will be a shopping/recreational area north of the downtown train tracks. This should spur development of the entire length of the canal and surrounding areas. If spurring doesn't get the job done, the King might consider other methods of encouragement that wouldn't be nearly as pleasant as spurring. The King also encourages (again strongly) the construction of a significant downtown parking facility, which will be free to visitors and will house a beautiful visitors-center staffed by the friendliest and most helpful subjects in all of the Kingdom. The King also requires all neighborhoods to install sidewalks wide enough to permit walkers and bike riders to co-exists peacefully. All gates (in gated neighborhoods) will have to be open until dark to permit strolling and perhaps even getting to know one another. After all the "requiring" the King will let his Tulsa subjects know that fixing up and prettying up the Kingdom alone will not make it enchanted----the subjects, after all, have always made our Kingdom rich and fair. It is so decreed this day by order of the King.
Chilinut (3 years ago)
JohnMayall/PeterGreen/JohnMcVie/JeremySpencer/ChristineMcVie /LindsayBuckingham/StevieNicks/EricClapton/BobBrunning/Danny Kirwan/WillieDixon/OtisSpann/ChristinePerfect/BobWeston/Dave Barker/BillyBurnette/RickVito/BekkaBramlett/DaveMason/Fleetw oodMac/EnglishRose/ThenPlayOn/KilnHouse/FutureGames/BareTree s/Penguin/MysterytoMe/HeroesareHardtoFind/Rumours/Live/Mirag e/TangointheNight/BehindtheMask/Chain/Time/TheDance/Mysteryt oMe/Tusk. As King for a day I'd challenge my subjects to prove they know more about Fleetwood Mac than me in order to win the tickets. I know I'm more passionate about seeing them than anyone else and decree they be given to me. By the way; points if you know who Christine Perfect was. Finally, the day of the concert everyone would be released from work and it would be Fleetwood Mac day with the group receiving keys to the city.
shawnaou (3 years ago)
To be Queen... I would make all people giddy - no matter their circumstances. I would make sure there would be no illnesses or injuries throughout the city. I would allow everyone to blast their favorite Bon Jovi single as loud as possible. I would make the temperature 75 degrees with a wind gusting no more than 7 mph. I would make all of the gas stations provide free gas to only women.
slumberstacy (3 years ago)
IF I WERE QUEEN OF TULSA

My royal edicts would include the following:

Remove sales tax on groceries and diapers.

Institute commuter rail service into downtown Tulsa from all suburbs with existing railroad tracks. For suburban communities without existing railroad tracks, institute express bus service.

Require local power companies to bury their power lines and NOT charge customers for it.

Complete repairs on all Tulsa roads and highways - not just pothole patching. Include expansion of all highways to 4 lanes in each direction and rebuilding all on and off ramps.

Develop riverside projects in Tulsa to rival San Antonio's and Oklahoma City's riverwalks. Include an amusement park and a water park.

Post signs on all highways reminding drivers that the left lane is for passing only.

No speeding tickets during rush hours. Instead, ticket slow drivers in the left lane.

Allow free parking, but actively ticket drivers who choose to take up two spaces.

Landscape the city highways so that they look as nice as 71st Street between Lewis and Yale. Use prisoners to do the work.

Remove the 2 extra crosswalks in front of the courthouse on 6th Street and let the pedestrians walk 10 yards further to use the crosswalks at the lights - like the rest of us mere mortals.

Remove the useless traffic light on Highway 75 at 111th Street.

Require SEM Group board members to pay for employee pensions.

Make it illegal to fire someone for being late on Monday.

Give Tulsa residents immunity from Oklahoma toll roads.

Forbid further commercial development of 71st Street between Memorial and Garnett.

Sync up all traffic lights on 71st Street from Memorial to Garnett.
trebla (3 years ago)
1. Listen to and heed what Bill Martinson is saying
2. Increase code enforcement personnel.
3. Increase the illegal sign gestapo force.
4. Require jail inmates to pick up trash.
5. Crack down on private lawn crews blowing trash, leaves and grass into the sewers.
6. Ban local TV stations from focusing on news outside of OK.
7. Ban any interviews with the Tulsa Street Department head before any ice or snow storms.
8. Show us Chrisite Glover's ring that she is always hiding. (Dad will do it)
9. Implement auto fines based on cameras at intersections to catch red / yellow light runners
10. Ban - Homeless, Will work for food panhandlers.
mr incredible (3 years ago)
Dedicate the state song to me and make the state flag purple!
twinkles (3 years ago)
If I were the Queen of Tulsa my reign would be brief but glorious. It would be golden age of enlightenment ending with a statue of me with very long legs being built in front of my favorite Sonic.
We will embrace our inner sand bar. River Parks will be renamed The Dunes.
Anyone connected with the demise of Bells will rebuild it with their bare hands.
Designers of the intersection of 71st and Yale will be forced to direct traffic out of the"how did I get in the left turn lane". (Yale north to 71st west)
No one with a business near the new baseball stadium will pay an extra cent until they actually see some increased revenue.
All weather people will take classes at the Yale school of drama.
Weather mini-series will be broadcast on alternative channels without interuption freeing up those of us who want to watch regular shows when it is raining in Kansas.
The old Oral Roberts building on Boulder is going down. It will be replaced by a park with a tasteful re-creation of the Antenna Bandana that onced graced the flag pole when Sunray used the building. In fact I think thats where I want my statue. The banana and me, together forever.
You may now bow.
bjames (3 years ago)
King for the Day…
If the City/County Library system and the City/County Health Departments are successful, then why not have the City/County Parks Department? I would combine the RiverParks, County Parks, City Parks and the storm water retention ponds that have sports fields into one department. With the administrative costs we would save we could open swimming pools and mow the grass.
I would have year around schools and each school starting in elementary school would teach at least one foreign language. How much easier would the Chamber of Commerce’s job be if we could tell prospective employers that every high school graduate attended year around school and spoke a foreign language? We should end social promotion; you can’t start the 3rd grade, until you have completed the 2nd.
Everyone would attend back to school nights and parent teacher’s conferences. I hear too many people complain about our schools but they don’t belong to the PTA, they don’t volunteer and they aren’t teaching. If you aren’t working on the solutions, you are part of the problem.
We should pay all teachers at least $5,000 more per year.
I would take the proceeds from the lottery and place them into a trust fund. Once the fund exceeded $100,000,000 schools could start receiving the interest proceeds and once the fund exceeded $500,000,000 I would start a venture capital fund that would be used to attracted new businesses to Oklahoma. This way the revenue to the schools would be more consistent and the new businesses would increase the tax base which would give the school systems even more revenue.
I would take the Pearl District and Whittier Square Neighborhoods and complete renovate them into residential and retail only, moving the manufacturing business into renovated industrial parks North of I-244.
Stop using foreign oil.
bjames (3 years ago)
King for the Day…
If the City/County Library system and the City/County Health Departments are successful, then why not have the City/County Parks Department? I would combine the RiverParks, County Parks, City Parks and the storm water retention ponds that have sports fields into one department. With the administrative costs we would save we could open swimming pools and mow the grass.
I would have year around schools and each school starting in elementary school would teach at least one foreign language. How much easier would the Chamber of Commerce’s job be if we could tell prospective employers that every high school graduate attended year around school and spoke a foreign language? We should end social promotion; you can’t start the 3rd grade, until you have completed the 2nd.
Everyone would attend back to school nights and parent teacher’s conferences. I hear too many people complain about our schools but they don’t belong to the PTA, they don’t volunteer and they aren’t teaching. If you aren’t working on the solutions, you are part of the problem.
We should pay all teachers at least $5,000 more per year.
I would take the proceeds from the lottery and place them into a trust fund. Once the fund exceeded $100,000,000 schools could start receiving the interest proceeds and once the fund exceeded $500,000,000 I would start a venture capital fund that would be used to attracted new businesses to Oklahoma. This way the revenue to the schools would be more consistent and the new businesses would increase the tax base which would give the school systems even more revenue.
I would take the Pearl District and Whittier Square Neighborhoods and complete renovate them into residential and retail only, moving the manufacturing business into renovated industrial parks North of I-244.
Stop using foreign oil.
Scott Smith (3 years ago)
popeye wins in my opinion.
Churchmouse (3 years ago)
If I were queen:
1) every school child would have recess
2) every school child and teacher would be required to exercise at least 3 times a week as part of the curriculum.
3) there would be public toilets on every block (I saw these in San Jose last summer - very convenient, since the restaurants were all closed!)
4) there would be light rail to any place in Tulsa, and free shuttles from the rail station to anywhere people needed to go
5) maufacturing companies would recycle their products to reduce the amount of waste in the landfills
6) products should be able to be repaired instead of replaced and taking up space in a landfill
7) all children would have safe and secure homes
8) people would be required to know their neighbors
9) The BOK Center would have a detailed seating chart so that online purchases would be easier
MLS (3 years ago)
If I were queen, I would:
1) Sit front row at the DMB concert.
2) I would dedicate a special day for all the NICU doctors and nurses.
3) I would make all the slow drivers not drive on the highway. If you can't go over 35, then get off.
4) I also like the no sales tax for groceries.
5) I would also like to have a girl/princess day, we all deserve it.

My list is pretty simple. I would hate to see what my husband's would be!!!
Tired (3 years ago)
If I were queen for a day, I would decree the following:

Government/Educational failures:

*Elected officials who have not followed through on campaign promises would be tossed to the streets.
*Legislative officials who claim that education is important yet fail to pass the budget within the self-imposed time frame would be fines their yearly salary which would then be placed in the Education fund. (Note: The officials have missed it not once, but five years in a row!)
*School administrators who have proven themselves to be ineffective, especially pointing at Tulsa Public Schools, would be fired. The current plan of placing them in another department and handing the incompetent individuals more money would be abolished.

*The Bell family would be issued a public apology and be given their rightful place back at the Fairgrounds.

Drivers:

*Drivers who fail to stop at red lights and to yield for emergency vehicles with no regard to human life will lose their license for two years and will be fined $3000.00.
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